Favorite Time of Day

Walking in the house from work is my favorite time of day. My daughter screams "Mommy's home" and runs to give me a hug. My son instantly turns towards my voice and starts crawling my direction. I'm amazed every day that they are glad to see me. I get a quick rundown of the day from the babysitter, say bye to her at the door with kids in my arms or by my side and then we get a few quick minutes of playtime before I start dinner. The evening seems to fly by and before you know it, Daddy comes home, we eat, I clean up about 25% of the meal and toys strewn around, then we are off to the bathtub. I'm always wishing we had time for a quick 15 or 20 minute walk after dinner. Maybe I should aspire for a walk just once a week.

Here's where things go wrong... bedtime. My daughter manipulates me throughout bedtime. More books, have to potty, need water, change the music, turn the light on and off, she wants to sit with me (hard to resist). So it takes me over an hour to get her to bed. My husband manages to get her into bed in about 20 minutes. I just don't get it. I've said too many times that I hate bedtime. I end up frustrated with her and frustrated with myself that I can't enjoy bedtime with my daughter. So instead of dealing with it, I've made myself busy with my son at bedtime so my husband ends up putting her to bed more often.

But once the kids are in bed, I feel like my "day" begins. Now is my time... my time to get something accomplished. There are times when I wish it was truly "my time" but it ends up being time to get laundry done, dishes done, dishwasher emptied, bills payed, emails answered, etc. Many nights I run to the grocery store or target at 8:30 or 9pm because I don't have any other time in the day to do it. But it's still my time. I may not always be doing what I want... getting manicures, reading, going to a pilates class, shopping or just sitting out enjoying a margarita... but it's still my time. Maybe someday I'll forget all those things I'm supposed to do and just do what I want.

Why am I blogging?

In the course of a day or week I mention to friends, co-workers, parents, the babysitter and husband little bits of my life that make me happy, frustrate me or are just simple little things that happen. But there isn't any place to consolidate all those little bits. Maybe I do it on purpose... so no one sees the full picture. No one person can put it all together and see what's really going on with me. Course, maybe I'm fooling no one.

So this will be my place where I pull it all together. I'm hoping I don't end up complaining all the time. I want to be able to talk about my kids, my constant amazement of them, how fast they change. I'd like to share what I thought marriage would be and what it has turned out to be. And of course sharing those two most important aspects of my life mixed with my job, career, profession or whatever else you'd like to call it. In my heart, my marriage and children are so important to me but it always seems they revolve around my job. Shouldn't it be the other way around?

So all in all, I think I need a place to talk about where I'm at in life, see if anyone relates and last but not least, a place to vent. Hopefully it will be a great resource and diary of sorts for me to look back on. Even better if people can read it and identify with me.

So here's to blogging...